my public advisory

For all future travelers to London’s sunny shores, I must place this public advisory:

Don’t visit West Drayton for the following reasons:
- it’s a hole
- it’s a mega big hole
- and of course, you’re likely to have your car broken into (though it does have a good curry house)

While I was at dinner with colleagues a week ago, some technologically advanced thieves used a Bluetooth scanner to detect my laptop (in standby mode) inside my boot. These kind soles decided it would be nice to make the key hole on the driver’s side door bigger. I can only guess they wanted to make sure that my key would always fit. They also decided I shouldn’t use air conditioning and thus took the liberty of removing my rear passenger window. Their workmanship wasn’t the greatest as they left a major mess in the back seat. How hard is it to get a job done properly? To their credit they did however remove the burden of carrying/worrying about my passport (which was in the laptop bag).

So, do good things happen to good people? If yes, then I’m probably not a good person.